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Matthew Dempsey

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Videos

VIDEOS

Why Gay Men & Women Fear Aging

Matthew Dempsey

When you're in your prime, you can feel the clock ticking and pressure mounting to achieve your goals before your "good years" are up. When you do become of a certain age, feeling more deflated and unattractive isn't uncommon. Ageism affects us all and perhaps more so for those of us who have already experienced other discrimination in our lives.

A Life and Depression

Matthew Dempsey

"There is nothing more depressing than having it all and still feeling sad." 

Depression affects most of us yet we're too afraid to talk about it when it's hard to explain why we feel so down with no logical reason. In this video, I talk about the struggle with depression and what we can do.

This is a tribute to my friend Alex who we recently lost to suicide because of his lesser known hard fought battle with depression. Regardless of the darkness of his life, he leaves a legacy of light and love.

Memorial contributions in Alex's name may be made to www.hopefordepression.org/support-hdrf/online-donation-form/

Gay Men & The Need To Perform

Matthew Dempsey

Knowing how to take the mask off and live more authentically isn't easy especially for us gay men who learned early on to fit in by being someone else. I talk to my close friend and comedian Jimmy Fowlie about how he's able to be a professional performer and know when to turn it off and just be himself.

Gay Men & Slut Shaming

Matthew Dempsey

Desperate Instagrammers, bar trolls, and Grindr sluts easily conjure up images that'll have any kween's eyes rolling for days. Though there's deeper context to a lot of sexual behavior, why does it so easily illicit such a visceral reaction in our own community? Check out my latest video on "Slut Shaming" to find out what it's about and what we can do to grow individually and collectively.

Gay Men & Racial Preference

Matthew Dempsey

Actor and activist Wilson Cruz and I talk about the role race plays in gay men's attraction towards each other.  Some say it's a "preference" while others contend it's just another racist smoke screen for White gay men to hide behind.

Owning Racism

Matthew Dempsey

Growing up gay and feeling like an outlier for most of my life easily lends itself to greater empathy for others who've felt the same. My experience also lends itself to the illusion that I couldn't possibly continue discriminating against others, including people of color. Watch my latest video on how I own racism in an effort to heal.

How To Become Friends With An Ex

Matthew Dempsey

Just because a romantic relationship expires doesn't mean a new connection can't eventually evolve. Becoming friends with an ex can be complex but not impossible. In my latest video, my good friend and ex-boyfriend Kyle Krieger and I share our personal story and what's helped us have a successful friendship post romance in addition to some tips for anyone looking to do the same.

Gay Men & The Shirtless Selfie

Matthew Dempsey

Social media let's us pick and choose what we present about ourselves, but how can we tell when it becomes more indulgent and less authentic? In my latest video, I speak with my friend Raymond Braun who previously worked at YouTube and knows a little something about social media trends particularly within the gay male community. We talk about the need to get likes, how a lot of gay men get them, and some of the issues from it all.

Gay Men & Bottom Shaming

Matthew Dempsey

In this video, I break down the psychological nuts and bolts of how and why we tend to label ourselves and other gay men. I go on to describe how this common practice can be really limiting individually and collectively as well as begins to describe how we can challenge bottom shaming so we can grow and heal (and have better sex)!

The Bond of Gays & Gals

Matthew Dempsey

In this, a love letter to the gay-loving-gals of the world, Psychotherapist Matthew Dempsey talks about the psychological and emotional benefits of the special bond between many women and gay men that doesn't limit yet enhances our overall capacity to love.

Relationships: Psychology of Breaking Up

Matthew Dempsey

Psychotherapist Matthew Dempsey speaks about how to effectively figure out when it's time to move on from a relationship and how to do it in the name of love. He describes how we can know where our stuff ends and our partner's begins as well as the unique challenges that can come up for gay men to draw the distinction.

Relationships: Keeping Love

Matthew Dempsey

Psychotherapist Matthew Dempsey speaks about how to keep love alive in your relationship. He describes common issues that come up, including the unique set of challenges gay men face when it comes to a power struggle between two men, and how to overcome it all to actually feel connection and love again.

Relationships: Finding Love

Matthew Dempsey

Psychotherapist Matthew Dempsey speaks about how to be ready for your best romantic connection. He describes common issues that come up, including the unique set of challenges gay men face when it comes to dating, and how to overcome them to secure the love you need.

Body Image

Matthew Dempsey

Psychotherapist Matthew J. Dempsey talks about common issues with body image and goes on to describe how it can specifically play out in the gay male community.

Sex

Matthew Dempsey

Psychotherapist Matthew J. Dempsey talks about common issues with sex and goes on to describe how it can specifically play out in the gay male community.

Shame & Vulnerability

Matthew Dempsey

Psychotherapist Matthew J. Dempsey talks about the role of shame in our lives and how vulnerability can help us heal emotional wounds and feel more connected to others. He goes on to describe more so how it can play out specifically in the gay male community. In a note, he writes: "Hello!

Compare & Despair

Matthew Dempsey

Psychotherapist Matthew J. Dempsey talks about how people can compare themselves to others and be left feeling not good enough. He goes on to describe more so how it can play out specifically in the gay male community.

Judgment

Matthew Dempsey

Psychotherapist Matthew J. Dempsey talks about why people tend to judge others easily at times and how it can play out specifically in the gay male community. Photo credit: Sara+Ryan Photography www.saraplusryan.com